Welcome to No Fear Friday, where I good-natured-ly make fun of bad
artwork from the Middle Ages, to hopefully inspire those interested in
the scribal arts to give it a try. This week:
Breastfeeding: Part Duex
Or: The Revenge of the Boob
Though not really
...maybe
Because these are pictures of breastfeeding, so there ARE boobs involved, but I'm focusing more on the ugly Renaissance babies and badly drawn female anatomy in this post.
As before....this post is full of BOOBS. If BOOBS offend you, stop
reading. Also, this is mostly religious art that I am good-naturedly
making fun of, so be warned.
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| Romanesque Fresco in the Santuario della Madonna delle Grazie a Frosinone |
More badly drawn female anatomy, this time featuring the return of the shoulder-boob!
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| Sebastiano Mainardi, 15th century |
Where to start? It's like someone told him that babies have a hard time holding their heads up, so we end up with a super rolly-polly baby who looks like he either has no neck or is so stoned out of his mind that he can't possibly even look at the boob he's reaching for. And then there's Mary's super large spindly alien hand.
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| Sebastiano Mainardi, 15th century |
And here the same artist is at it again. What is with this guy's inability to draw a baby with proper neck function? Sure, infants have a hard time holding their heads up, but these babies are at least 3-4 months old. If they can't hold their heads up by now something is seriously amiss.
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| Anonimo - Madonna che allatta il Bambino, 1410 circa |
This baby's head is thrown back, but at least he's using his neck to hold up his head. Though I have to wonder if this artist got his idea of how babies nurse by looking at cows or goats. That's what the super elongated neck reminds me of, a herbivore at a teat. I'd say I'm sorry for Mary, but she's got the same vacant placid expression of a mother cow nursing... which just adds to the impression.
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| Madonna lactating the Child by Carlo Crivelli (1435-1495) |
Baby Jesus is rolling his eyes so hard they are taking his entire body with them. That's why Mary's got that grip on his leg, because he's trying to backflip off her lap.
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| Andrea e Nino Pisano, 1346-1348 |
Speaking of eyes, check out the massive amount of side-eye Mary is giving her baby here. That is some serious shade being cast.
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| Master of the Saint Ursula Legend, 1475–99 |
What post featuring ugly Renaissance babies would be complete without an appearance of the 'little old man' version of painting babies? The body isn't too bad, though there's some weird stiffness going on there. But that face belongs on a grown man, and the expression is straight out of 'Beevus and Butthead'. It even looks like he's got a bit of a peach-fuzz mustache due to the color and light play.
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| Virgem do leite by Frei Carlos (1518-1525) |
This little dude's head is definitely squarely in the 'little old man' camp, and the gesturing arm makes it look like he is totally pontificating about how Mary should nurse him. And, again, what is it with giving Mary super big alien hands? It completely distracts from the fact that her boob is growing out of her lower ribcage.
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| "The Virgin and Child before a Firescreen" by Robert Campin, 1440 |
"Hey Girl, I'm just about to get me some milk. Would you care to join me?"
Ok, that's enough for today. And I think that's quite enough breastfeeding pictures for now. Next "No Fear Friday" will get back to silly animals and other badly drawn medieval art.
Next post in the series: TBD
Previous post in the series: Breastfeeding
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