No Fear Friday: Horses

Welcome to No Fear Friday, where I good-natured-ly make fun of bad artwork from the Middle Ages, to hopefully inspire those interested in the scribal arts to give it a try. This week:

Horses

Horses are just hard to draw. Like, really hard to draw. I can't even make too much fun of these medieval illustrators, because these horses all suffer from the same problems that many a modern artist would have. Seriously, I think I know all of two people who can actually draw horses well, and I am not one of them.

So, let's have some fun, shall we?

Bréviaire de Belleville, vol. II, Bibliothèque nationale de France, Latin 10484, fol. 330v.

Human expressions on cats are horrifying, human expressions on horses are endearing. Perspective problems aside, this horse is clearly dubious about what sort of embarrassment I am going to put his brethren through. No worries, Mr. Ed, it's all in good fun.

1300-1325, Netherlands, BL Stowe 17 The Maastricht Hours

This horse is excited! He's got a dapper spotted red coat and knows exactly where he's going...over there, the opposite direction his knight wants him to go.

The Luttrell Psalter 1325-1340, British Library Add MS 42130, f163r

Ok, now we're starting to get into some drawing problems. If that horse were actually rearing the next frame of this picture is the poor thing overbalancing and landing on it's belly. But, let's be honest here. If drawing a horse standing still is hard, drawing one in motion is even worse.

The Romance of Alexander, 1338-44, Bodleian Library (MS Bodley 264)

Nope, horse legs definitely don't work like that. Not to mean that they don't buck, and the end result might look similar, but the way this is drawn makes it look (to me) like the horse is just leaning forward and stiffly swinging it's legs back from the hips instead of using, you know, all of his joints to kick out.

The Luttrell Psalter 1325-1340, British Library Add MS 42130, f63v

I Can Fly!!! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

So some specially trained horses can make crazy flying leaps like this, but not usually quite this flat. But this guy is having a grand old time pretending to be superman so I won't hold it against him.

Luttrell-Psalter. London, British Library, Add. Ms. 42130, fol. 181v.

More proportion problems here with too short legs and a head so long that I'm trying really, really, hard not to make a 'long in the face' joke... And failing miserably. Not that the horse would notice, he's obviously been eating the good grass.

And can I take a moment to call out the Luttrell Psalter here? Why so many silly horses Luttrell Psalter?

Maciejowski Bible 1244-1254, Morgan M.638

Again with the too short legs, only this time paired with a massively thick neck. Or at least it looks massively oversized because the head is so ridiculously small. If the head and the legs were more correctly sized this actually wouldn't be too bad a rendering... except they are not the right size. At all.

But at least the body is the right size for the rider. Unlike...

French 1280-1299, Bodmer 147 Estoire Del Graa

Look, if you can put your leg down and touch the ground while you are riding, then what possible advantage is it to ride that poor toy pony into battle? No wonder the little things are so grumpy, those knights must weigh a ton. Really, this illustration only makes sense if you picture the horses as props and it's happening on-stage in some Shakespearean farce.

Psalterium. Normandië, ca. 1180. Collectie G.J. Gérard - 76 F 13, fol. 5v

This poor horse isn't having any fun either. Those spindly little front legs look like they are going to collapse at any moment under the weight of the rider, and the horse is just like, "Ugh, stop playing with the bird and get off of me, puh-lease!"

Bibliothèque National de France, Paris, Ms grec 2244, Byzanz, Folio 52r

One, horses do not stand on their tippy-hooves like that. Two, what are you doing to that poor horse!?

Codex Manesse Folio 164v

Tippy-hooves agian, but the rear legs are tame compared to this poor horse's head. He's got a mane more like a lion, and the perspective problems give us one ear on top of his head and the other hanging off of his lower jaw. Not to mention the canine muzzle and goofy expression.

Codex Manesse fol. 192v

But then again the Manesse Codex seems to have a thing for goofy looking horses.

So, to recap, go to the Luttrell Psalter for silly horses, and the Manesse Codex for goofy horses. Yes, those are technical scribal terms.

And, of course, the best of the worst for last:

L'estoire de Merlin, France ca. 1316 (BL, Add 10292, fol. 213r)

There is just so much going on here, I'm not even sure where to begin. I guess I could talk about the limp-noodle legs which clearly have no bones in them at all, or the massive baby-got-back of the hind quarters... but I can't stop looking at that horse on the right. Is it a horse? Looks more like an egg, or a fat dumpy spider. I know it's all caused by perspective problems, but my mind can't seem to quite wrap it's way around a horse being a horse, of course... except when it's Humpty-dumpty about to wrap up a dead knight in spider silk for a later meal.

Next post in the series: Owls

Previous post in the series: Cats